Top 3 Most Awesome Ways to Destroy Your Engine

Once you get past the whole “I completely horrified my engine” thing, catastrophic engine damage is really awesome to see.  Here is the Nutts & Bolts Top 3 Most Awesome Ways to Destroy your Engine:

1) Blowing pistons and / or connecting rods right through the engine block.

Typically when your internal engine parts forcefully become external, they do so for good reason. You likely built the engine wrong, over revved it, or had a complete lack of lubrication. What you may not realize, is that this seemingly negative action is a really just your car’s way of telling you it wants a more powerful engine.

2) Destroying your valves in epic fashion.

Whether it is losing your timing belt at highway speeds with an interference engine, or running lean enough to turn steel into magma, it sure is fun to see.  The grossest display of shared combustion chamber space that I’ve seen was a Cadillac Catera that I worked on many years ago.  It had broken the heads off the valves, bounced them around the cylinders, and then pushed them right back through the exhaust ports.  The inside of the engine looked as if it were trying to combust rocks instead of gasoline.  It was an epic win for shared space that day. Let’s not forget burned valves though, you get an extra points when the valves burn and destroy your turbo in the same instant.

3) Recipe for disaster: The automotive cocktail of destruction.

  • 1 Blown intake / head gasket
  • 1 Part Oil
  • 4 Part Antifreeze
  • 2 tbsp metal shavings
  • Mix vigorously
  • Cook at 220 degrees for approximately 3 minutes or until engine eruption is complete.
  • Enjoy automotive cocktail of destruction.

Bon appetit!

7 comments to Top 3 Most Awesome Ways to Destroy Your Engine

  • Stingray

    "What you may not realize, is that this seemingly negative action is a really just your car’s way of telling you it wants a more powerful engine."

    But, what your car wants isn't always what it gets, especially if all IT wants to do is spit engine parts all over the road!

  • j cat

    the reason most engines die an early life are coolant neglect. use of non synthetic oil and cheap fram oil filters/other poorly rated filters, and lack of regular tune ups..plugs,air/fuel filter , and getting leaks/other improper operation checked quickly…not when the pistons go thru the hood.

    you could have 200hp excess power in any vehicle , don't matter , if its not properly serviced on a regular basis..

    then you have the hack repair shops ! is't a crap shoot!

  • J Cat > I couldn't have agreed more. Replacing antifreeze, engine oil, transmission fluid, diff fluid, filters, and general maintenance items is the cheapest car insurance you can buy. Hack shops are another topic for another day ;)

    -Jeremy

  • Ben

    Another thing that adds greatly to engine wear is not waiting for it to be up to temperature before pushing it hard.

  • pie

    You know what else makes an excellent cocktail for engine destruction? Water. By that I mean, drive through a 3 foot deep puddle with a cold air intake on your turbo car and make sure that the filter is completely submerged. Then try to limp it home, after you've removed the cold side IC pipe and opened the butterfly on the throttle body, only to find water pour out of your intake manifold.

  • Christopher

    cold air intakes on turbo-charged cars are pointless. If you had a short ram and a much more efficient air cooling system like an inter cooler that wouldn’t have happened. Should have had the AEM by-pass valve if you were using a cold air intake.

  • Rod

    I have to go with the connecting rod failures. One I have had to deal with many times is because home builders will skip the step of having the big ends of use rods reconditioned, especially when they have replaced the rod bolts. The engine runs fine at first, but as that out of round big end fails to properly support the bearing, well, you know what happens soon after, and it is never pretty.

    Thanks for the fun article!

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